Ever since I became a mother of two, I've been writing in a book called The Happiness Project. It's essentially a diary for Mums with a very small amount of space each day where I can write about something that made me happy.
My intention was to use it as a way of remaining positive even on those days when I was surrounded my negativity. Even when I was stressed, exhausted, in pain, miserable... I have used this book as a way of almost forcing myself to look back on my day and find just one 'happy' thing. It's helped me to focus on the good stuff, even if only for a moment. It's helped me to realise, no matter how awful my day was, there is always something good about each one.
Reading over my entries I can now have a giggle at what I've written... laughing is something I've had trouble doing until recently. I remember wanting to do anything but laugh as I wrote some of the entries. Depressed, anxious, sleep deprived, lonely... sometimes I'd sit on the edge of my bed for 20 minutes trying to think of just one good thing about the day. I giggle now... because some of my entries simply read "Today, I survived." Wow, had things really become that bad?
I giggle at other entries because they genuinely bring back happy memories. "She did it. J finally slept in her bed!" I remember how challenging her 'big bed' transition was and how my husband and I could never see how we would get out of the mess we were in... yet here we are, with a toddler in her big bed.
"B's smile melts my heart."
"I got my haircut today and I love it."
"Both kids slept long enough for me to have a coffee with R!"
You get the idea... I recommend you try it!
For my very first blog entry (and by the way, I am a total novice when it comes to blogs) I thought I'd share with you the entry that has meant the most out of nearly a year of entries. It was probably the hardest one to write... but it was the one that has ended up changing my life.
A few words, written in a tiny yellow book. May 12, 2016.
What powerful words they were...